Wednesday Lee Friday
22 May 2013 @ 12:59 pm
Today, Amazon announced Amazon Worlds.
It's their shiny new fanfic platform so "writers" who can't quite get it together to create a milieu, settings, conflicts, arcs, or characters can still make money from their literary masturbation. For the record, I am pro-masturbation. I just don't want to see it online in places where I should be seeing the real thing. Also, fuck fanfic. Fuck it.



My extremely condescending comments on fanfic are as follows:Collapse )
Also, if fanfic is published, how does one distinguish what is actually becoming canon in a given lexicon?

And before someone else asks me if I would be complimented if someone wrote fanfic about Sadie, or Mikey, or any other character of mine--listen up. I'm a mature adult, which means I can refrain from killing you, or even hitting you. But if you steal my characters and do some fucked up shit with them--I will hate you with every fibre of my being. Hate. Honest-to-Zod wishing terrible things on you, lighting black candles in your honor, almost ashamed at my own intensely vitriolic loathing of anyone who would do this where it could be seen by another human being (or sentient being of any other species).

When people talk about their pets as if they are their children, I find that annoying. I'm not Pentelope and JoJo's "mom." That's just dumb IMO.
But my characters? I *am* their creator. They are mine. MINE! And they don't do a goddamn thing unless I say so (are you also noticing that this attitude would not actually be conducive to child rearing?).

Amazon, I've always stuck up for you and your outsourcing ways. And this is how you do me? No...
I'm so sad.
Seriously, I wish this hadn't happened during my menses because I am not taking it well at all. I kinda feel like Writing is over; but that's alarmist isn't it?
Isn't it?



In other writing news, I'm almost half way through reading Oryx and Crake. It's kicking my ass, for sure. What I find most amazing about it is that the writing is lyrical and poetic even though the POV character is not. Because I write mainly in the first-person, I don't do this. I've told myself that it can't be that way--but now that I see that it can, I feel sort of remiss in some way. Like I could have been writing a whole lot better but I wasn't pushing myself, reasoning that the prose had to sound like the character.
Then again, one could argue that the strength of my writing is the raw voices. At any rate, Atwood is inspiring me to try some more 3rd person stuff and to play around with poetic language amid abrasive characters.

*********Actually dudes, I posted this on Dreamwidth and am crossposting it here. It doesn't mean I love you any less. Honest. On Dreamwidth? Add me: "Wednes."
 
 
Inquiries will reach me @: Hell. I am in hell
Color Me: infuriatedinfuriated
 
 
Wednesday Lee Friday
20 May 2013 @ 07:47 pm
Now that I'm an *ahem* professional TV reviewer, I don't blog about TV here much. This weekend though, we had probably the most badass Doctor Who finale in the history of both Doctor Who and finales. Damn.
That shit was incredible.
I don't know why everyone's always bitching about Moffat.

Game of Thrones was merely adequate this week. Joffery's dicketry is getting tired, and the whole show is marred by every scene being too damn short--and every character not getting enough screen time. If a book is 500 words longer than a previous book, why can't the season be one episode longer?
C'mon HBO, you're a friggin' gold mine. Don't cheap out on the fans.

Finally read Under the Dome. It was long. Also, it's one of those books that makes you hate people. It's very truthy. That's SK horror.

As long as I'm on the internet, I might as well tell you what we're having for dinner. I'm roasting gold potatoes and hunks of keilbasa with peppers and veggies. When it's done roasting, I'm gonna put a creamy horseradish sauce on it. It's gonna be SO tits!

Bates Motel finale tonight. Stooooooked!

*********Actually dudes, I posted this on Dreamwidth and am crossposting it here. It doesn't mean I love you any less. Honest. On Dreamwidth? Add me: "Wednes."
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Color Me: tiredtired
 
 
Wednesday Lee Friday
18 May 2013 @ 08:07 pm
Actually, people told me this after "A Stabbing for Sadie" first came out. I had no idea Salinger's books had terrible editing. Bahahahahahahaaa!


I write like
J. D. Salinger

I Write Like by Mémoires, journal software. Analyze your writing!




*********Actually dudes, I posted this on Dreamwidth and am crossposting it here. It doesn't mean I love you any less. Honest. On Dreamwidth? Add me: "Wednes."
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Color Me: hothot
 
 
Wednesday Lee Friday
Project: Buy a gun for home protection has been dismantled. I'm feeling less anxious with the addition of more meds and etc. This still isn't a particularly safe neighborhood, but I'd rather save up to get the hell out of here than making sure I can kill anyone who tries to mess with us.

Got the first mockups for my new website design. They look nice, and I'm really pleased to have someone reliable to work on it for me. The Kiss Me Like You Love Me audiobook will be done soon, and available at Audible.com soon after that. It's got some familiar voices along with some new ones. I've heard some of the reads, and they are awesome.

I ate a whole pineapple over the course of last week.
It was not in season, and thus not very sweet or pineappley.
H got fresh cherries at the store last week. They were awesome.
Cherries go well in absolutely everything. I used them in ground chicken meatballs and they were fabbo.
I've been craving potatoes and sausage in horseradish sauce.
So I'm making that next week.

New short story is in the works. Subbing it at the end of the month.
It's a 3rd person narrative, because I need practice with that.
Finished reading Under the Dome.
It's depressing as shit, and made me really mad most of the way through.
People suck, and SK is damn good at conveying it.

Been having crazy, violent nightmares lately. I was bashing some lady over the head with a wine bottle in one, and trying not to get stabbed in another. H is almost never in my dreams, which I think is weird.

*********Actually dudes, I posted this on Dreamwidth and am crossposting it here. It doesn't mean I love you any less. Honest. On Dreamwidth? Add me: "Wednes."
 
 
Color Me: cynicalcynical
 
 
Wednesday Lee Friday
14 May 2013 @ 06:15 pm
I disagreed with Jon Stewart last night. Aside from his occasional making fun of fat people--it's rare that Stewbeef and I disagree. But I don't understand the problem with the IRS "scandal." Groups get zillions of dollars from giant corporations, and they don't have to tell anyone where it comes from. Said groups then get to spend that money however they want--so long as they don't "coordinate" with a candidate. As we learned last election season, "not-coordinating" can involve being someone's parent or child, being their BFF, or even being their former coordinator. We saw churches telling congregations who they should vote for--threatening them with hell if they didn't. Yet none of these people paid taxes under the guise of being community based. Really?

So now the IRS is in the wrong for saying "let's look at groups that are advertising themselves as political?" Well duh. If I start a business called "Wednesday's Pot Emporium" and one called "Wednesday's Earthen Jars" it should not surprise me if one of these names gets more police scrutiny than the other.
I'm not clear on how this makes Obama a monster, or how this means the nutter screaming that the nigger Kenyan is coming for our freedomz is suddenly correct. I admit that I think the Tea Party is a oligarchal monster pretending to be an offshoot of ACORN (funny how grass roots organizations are awesome when they're for freeedumz).

In the end, I'd like to see Elizabeth Warren and Al Franken in charge of absolutely everything. Guys like Boehner, Paul Ryan, et al can give all their money to the poor (as Jesus commands) and get a shit job working at Wal*Mart.

As for me, I've got a zillion things going on, only some of which are firmly poised to blow up in my face. I'm also reading Under the Dome, which is seriously adding to my stress. I found out that the bad guy, Big Jim Rennie is being played by the DEA brother-in-law from Breaking Bad. Good call.

H and I invited another couple for dinner last night. We used our tax money to get a vacuum cleaner, so we're less embarrassed to have people over now. I made falafel, quinoa with veggies, and hummus. They brought choco peanut butter brownies, and some baklava. Mmmmmm...

*********Actually dudes, I posted this on Dreamwidth and am crossposting it here. It doesn't mean I love you any less. Honest. On Dreamwidth? Add me: "Wednes."
 
 
Inquiries will reach me @: next to JoJo
Color Me: crankycranky
 
 
Wednesday Lee Friday
14 May 2013 @ 12:00 pm
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Wednesday Lee Friday
13 May 2013 @ 12:00 pm
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Wednesday Lee Friday
12 May 2013 @ 12:00 pm
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Wednesday Lee Friday
11 May 2013 @ 12:00 pm
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Wednesday Lee Friday
10 May 2013 @ 03:48 pm
Hey kids,

You know how audiobooks are crazy expensive?
Well...The Finster Effect audiobook is now on sale for $1.99

I know, right?

Get it here.

It really is a super good deal, the kind you should tell people about.
It's usually $25. And I don't think it'll be at this crazy low price for long.

*********Actually dudes, I posted this on Dreamwidth and am crossposting it here. It doesn't mean I love you any less. Honest. On Dreamwidth? Add me: "Wednes."
 
 
Color Me: thirstythirsty
 
 
Wednesday Lee Friday
10 May 2013 @ 12:00 pm
  • Thu, 21:30: Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffin' glue.
  • Thu, 21:38: Oh, and #CriminalMinds, please learn what #EMDR actually is and how it works. Whoever wrote last night's ep should be embarrassed. #CBS
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Wednesday Lee Friday
09 May 2013 @ 12:00 pm
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Wednesday Lee Friday
08 May 2013 @ 12:00 pm
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Wednesday Lee Friday
When they want to do maintenance work in our building, the office sends us a vague note telling us to crate any animals and move stuff around...and they'll be by some time in the next couple of weeks. Yes, they actually give us a time frame of weeks.

After fucking us over several times with this last required maintenance visit, they finally showed up several hours late today to change the fucking windows we didn't even want changed in the first place.

So what do these assholes do? They take the windows completely out of both bedrooms, and just walk away. Yeah. I admit, I made the assumption that they were not idiots and that they gave something close to a rat's ass about renters. I also thought that anyone who was not a fucking dumbass would take one window out, replace it, then take the other one out. They are in different rooms after all.
After all, that's what a sane person would do. My mistake.

Now Pentelope would never run out an open door or window. Ever. JoJo would not come out if someone was in the room messing with the window. But if say, a window was removed and then everyone left that room...he might very well leap out the window. Since he isn't here and neither of us can find him, I can only assume that's what happened.

Hartman and Tyner is easily the worst, by a WIDE margin, worst place I have ever lived. I've been to trailer parks that have better management, and stayed at homeless shelters that afforded residents more courtesy and basic respect.

Well, I've had it. I'm reporting them for their various illegal entries, and for that asshole who messed with my toothbrush. I'm reporting the lack of fixing things, the lease violations, that time they told us not to call the cops when people upstairs are fighting, everything. Because fuck them! Fuck them!

EDIT: JoJo is back. He was close by.

*********Actually dudes, I posted this on Dreamwidth and am crossposting it here. It doesn't mean I love you any less. Honest. On Dreamwidth? Add me: "Wednes."
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Inquiries will reach me @: looking for JoJo
Color Me: irritatedKill Mode
 
 
Wednesday Lee Friday
07 May 2013 @ 12:00 pm
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Wednesday Lee Friday
06 May 2013 @ 12:00 pm
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Wednesday Lee Friday
05 May 2013 @ 12:00 pm
  • Sun, 01:11: Whenever "Floyd" trends, I pretend people are listening to Dark Side of the Moon, not rolling their eyes at that chump, Mayweather. #asshat
  • Sun, 01:31: Ah, Cinco de Mayo. The one day a year when America is too drunk to remember that they hate other cultures.
  • Sun, 04:26: Chicken Head is a sexual euphemism. It would have been good if I'd remembered that before I needed to google a pic of one. Also, #cock.
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Wednesday Lee Friday
04 May 2013 @ 12:00 pm
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Wednesday Lee Friday
03 May 2013 @ 12:00 pm
  • Thu, 22:32: I must've been in a good mood when I saw #Prometheus in the theatre. Seeing it now on #HBO, it's not that good. Pretty, but so was #Avatar.
  • Thu, 22:39: "How sharper than a carcharodon carcharias's tooth, it is to have a thankless child...with a bite radius about *this* wide!" #Sharkspeare
  • Thu, 22:41: A tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury Signifying nothing...except that Kitner kid spilling out all over the docks. #sharkspeare
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Wednesday Lee Friday
02 May 2013 @ 12:00 pm
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Wednesday Lee Friday
02 May 2013 @ 06:57 am
The Finster Effect audiobook drops today. TODAY!!!

That means you can buy it.
Right now.
NOW!!!

No waiting...
I bet most of you can put it right on your phones.


To take the rat-infested, Michigan-flavored, zombie madness with you wherever you go.

*********Actually dudes, I posted this on Dreamwidth and am crossposting it here. It doesn't mean I love you any less. Honest. On Dreamwidth? Add me: "Wednes."
 
 
Color Me: excitedexcited
 
 
Wednesday Lee Friday
01 May 2013 @ 12:00 pm
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Wednesday Lee Friday
30 April 2013 @ 12:00 pm
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Wednesday Lee Friday
29 April 2013 @ 04:59 pm
Marketing 2.0 is about to get underway as I update my website, start a newsgroup, and continue with the paid adverts. Audiobooks will (hopefully) be out soon--but that's tougher since it's not all under my control. I'm not gonna be linking this blog to my site anymore--at least not as the main blog. I have a big awesome plan for something I could tell people about that they don't already know and will find fascinating.

So I'm stoked about that.

TV Reviews continue to be fun and good for exposure. The money is not great, but the writeoffs are awesome.

We watched Defiance, all they've showed so far. It was not bad. Derivative, but hell, what isn't? There are some future-Lannisters in it. Bright blonde hair, ruthless while pretending to be on the level, and inappropriate nakedness between family members. Mom, please put on something besides beads before you hug your kid. All I remembered was the door and weights, that there were witches, and that a girl a little older than me (at the time, I was probably about 11) was trying to steal a grown-up lady's husband. Amazingly, she was successful, which blew my mind as a kid.

For H, I got some Assassin's Creed game he had on his wishlist. He likes it, though he says he's "way behind."

Tonight I have two TV reviews--thank the gods The Following is finally ending tonight. I've had fun mocking it, and puzzling how Bacon and Purefoy could have thought this was good writing. *swoon* Purefoy...
It's so disappointing that such a promising show was SO terrible. I'm still digging Bates Motel. Both of the leads, Freddie Highmore and Vera Farmiga, give excellent performances. I expected the tacked-on brother to be a throwaway character, but he's also been interesting and good.

Reading Under the Dome so I can be in-the-know when the series comes out this summer--I'm totally reviewing that too.

*********Actually dudes, I posted this on Dreamwidth and am crossposting it here. It doesn't mean I love you any less. Honest. On Dreamwidth? Add me: "Wednes."
 
 
Color Me: nauseatednauseated
Background Noise: Joan Jett: Crimson and Clover
 
 
Wednesday Lee Friday
29 April 2013 @ 12:00 pm
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Wednesday Lee Friday
28 April 2013 @ 12:00 pm
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Wednesday Lee Friday
27 April 2013 @ 12:00 pm
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Wednesday Lee Friday
26 April 2013 @ 12:00 pm
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Wednesday Lee Friday
25 April 2013 @ 12:00 pm
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Wednesday Lee Friday
25 April 2013 @ 03:29 am
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Wednesday Lee Friday
24 April 2013 @ 05:11 pm
I have devoted my life to the worship of Choffy.
People actually tell me that I make it on the weak side. Not being a coffee drinker, I don't really know how strong steeped beans are supposed to be. But honestly, Choffy makes me feel sort of drunk.
Not drunk drunk. Not a head buzz at all. But like, a body buzz--which I don't think I've ever gotten from booze. Choffy is a vascodialator so it makes my blood vessels relax and open up. It also makes me feel like I need a nap. I'm gonna start drinking it at the end of the day instead of the beginning.

Work is going okay. I need to pursue more avenues for making money with writing. A lot of the gigs I'm finding are evil enough that I wouldn't want to do them under my own name. But then, do I really want to do work that I feel I should hide from people who know me? Probably--because I'm a big fan of paying my own bills and buying my own stuff. And I need a new computer.

My current clients are pretty cool though. Easy to work with and decent pay for what I'm doing. The sex writing is getting me more notice than the horror stuff--which I guess makes sense since more people admit to enjoying sex than admit to loving horror. *sigh* I was hoping KLMLYM would get reviewed by my beloved Jack Ketchum. No dice. That's a shame, since I honest think he'd dig it. Then again, I'd be crushed if he thought it sucked...maybe so crushed that I'd stop writing horror altogether--and nobody wants that.

In re: horror. I'm not sure what I want to work on next. I have two partial novels (NaNos, so VERY loose rough drafts of about 55K words) that could both be made into something cool. One is a huge story that includes a monster in a lake and was supposed to capture the scope and bloody whimsy of Christopher Moore. That's when I learned I couldn't possibly carry a cast that big. But then I wrote The Finster Effect where the cast is almost that large and diverse.
The other partial I have is about a chick with erotomania who's in love with her hot hot boss. This, like most of my work, has no parallel with my own life. Bahahahahaa! Anyway, it's told from both MC's POV's. I don't remember enough about it to say if it's any good, but I'll probably take a look at it soon.
Lately I've been working on short stories in between other work projects. I look around at the call for subs and treat them like homework assignments. I've got a cool one in the works right now. 3rd person POV, which is something I have to work on.
New Stig & The Puppetman coming up. I really hope those are as funny as I think they are.

Talked to a web guy who suggested moving my whole site over to Wordpress. I have no idea how any of that works, my ignorance about such things is annoyingly pervasive. So I gotta research all that before I can figure out what to do next.

*********Actually dudes, I posted this on Dreamwidth and am crossposting it here. It doesn't mean I love you any less. Honest. On Dreamwidth? Add me: "Wednes."
 
 
Color Me: hopefulhopeful
Background Noise: Richard Cheese
 
 
Wednesday Lee Friday
22 April 2013 @ 12:00 pm
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Wednesday Lee Friday
21 April 2013 @ 12:00 pm
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Wednesday Lee Friday
20 April 2013 @ 12:00 pm
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Wednesday Lee Friday
19 April 2013 @ 12:00 pm
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Wednesday Lee Friday
19 April 2013 @ 05:00 am
I've been getting progressively more brave with my Kinkly articles. I started with something very jokey and general. I moved in to reviewing products and discussing my experiences with them. If that doesn't sound brave, keep in mind that I'm a married woman writing reviews for vibrators that are published on websites and picked up by other websites, stores, and etc so that all over the world, people know that I think the Hitachi magic wand is wicked awesome.

So yeah...

Then I wrote about when I used to be a phonesex op. Before I started doing that, I warned my family that they could un-list me as family if my doing sex work embarrassed them. It didn't.

My new article is on the hot, hot, HOT topic of fat sex. This isn't a hot topic because it's so hot, but because fat flaming on the internet is one of the most brutal and pervasive bastions of online hate, bigotry, judgement, and general nastiness. It's kind of why I'm grateful that the internet wasn't around when I was in school. But I digress.

I wrote all about being fat, being uncomfortable about it, and having sex with a body that has always been...and remains fat. I'm especially nervous because the editor at this site is more assertive than I'm used to, and actually makes changes to things that are different than what I'd have done. The whole thing makes me edgy and tense, and I await the kind of flaming that only the Internets can dish out. So...we shall see.

*********Actually dudes, I posted this on Dreamwidth and am crossposting it here. It doesn't mean I love you any less. Honest. On Dreamwidth? Add me: "Wednes."
 
 
Color Me: creativecreative
 
 
Wednesday Lee Friday
18 April 2013 @ 12:00 pm
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Wednesday Lee Friday
16 April 2013 @ 12:00 pm
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Wednesday Lee Friday
15 April 2013 @ 12:00 pm
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Wednesday Lee Friday
14 April 2013 @ 12:00 pm
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Wednesday Lee Friday
14 April 2013 @ 06:24 am
I like to take walks at this time of day (6am). I took one this morning after an oddly timed nap (less than half a brownie was WAY too much, apparently). There weren't many people around except random dog walkers. I chatted with one this morning, nice guy. Nobody I'd talked to before. Then this happened:

*chat, chat, chat*

They: "Are you married?"

Me: Yes

They: "How long?"

Me: *tells him*

They: "You guys have kids?"

Me: Nope, just some cats.

They: "That's good."

Me: ... I'm sorry?

They: "I don't wanna talk out of turn, but you shouldn't be having babies with a guy who's...like that."

Me: Like what?

They: "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, it's none of my business. You have a good day now." *walks away with dog*

Me: *thinking* WTF, seriously? If I knew the guy or knew he knew who H was, I'd assume he was racist. But I didn't know what the hell to think.

I came home and was pretty pissed off. I went into the bathroom to splash some water on me, and see that while I was napping, my recently touched up blue hair left a bit of a smear on my cheek and to the left of my eye. In low light, it looked like someone beat the crap out of my face.

So in reality, my neighbor was trying to be a nice guy. In retrospect, it would not have been ridiculous for him to have reacted even more strongly. I want to correct this impression of my wonderful husband, but I didn't even ask the guy his name--so I have no idea who he is. He's the guy with some kind of doberman mix on the other side of the complex.

Sorry, neighborman. You're alright by me!
I promise, NOBODY smacks me around.

*********Actually dudes, I posted this on Dreamwidth and am crossposting it here. It doesn't mean I love you any less. Honest. On Dreamwidth? Add me: "Wednes."
 
 
Inquiries will reach me @: in and around Pheasant Run Apts
 
 
Wednesday Lee Friday
13 April 2013 @ 12:00 pm
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Wednesday Lee Friday
12 April 2013 @ 12:00 pm
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Wednesday Lee Friday
11 April 2013 @ 07:32 pm
I am terribly sorry to hear of the passing of [personal profile] opalcat.

I plan to mock some stupid people in her honor.
And maybe be kind to someone too.

*********Actually dudes, I posted this on Dreamwidth and am crossposting it here. It doesn't mean I love you any less. Honest. On Dreamwidth? Add me: "Wednes."
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Color Me: sadsad
 
 
Wednesday Lee Friday
11 April 2013 @ 12:00 pm
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Wednesday Lee Friday
10 April 2013 @ 12:00 pm
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Wednesday Lee Friday
09 April 2013 @ 12:00 pm
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Wednesday Lee Friday
08 April 2013 @ 06:27 pm
You know what would have been nice?
If ol' Marge had died without me having to read her stupid, bitchy quote about socialism and "other people's money" a zillion fucking times.

*********Actually dudes, I posted this on Dreamwidth and am crossposting it here. It doesn't mean I love you any less. Honest. On Dreamwidth? Add me: "Wednes."
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Color Me: aggravatedaggravated
 
 
Wednesday Lee Friday
08 April 2013 @ 12:00 pm
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Wednesday Lee Friday
07 April 2013 @ 12:00 pm
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